Survivor Girls by Birth Year

 As I've done several times before, I'm going to do a post on the women that have played the game of Survivor.  This time, I thought I'd go by birth year and pick which one I'd most like to... be with.  If you know what I mean.  I'm going to start with the youngest and keep getting older until there's no one left that I would want to... be with.  

1998: Jessica Stanek, David vs. Goliath (Jessica Peet)
We start with 1998, and Jessica's only competition was S42 winner Maryanne.  Jessica, meanwhile, is married to Astro's pitcher Ryne Stanek.  Oh well.

1997: Sara Wilson, 41
Sara is literally the only female from this year, so hopefully, that'll change in the future.  Although she is very pretty and I wish she had lasted longer on 41.

1996: Julia Sokolowski, Kaoh Rong
Finally we get a year with competition!  Julia beats out Lauren O'Connell and Tori Meehan.  As I've documented before, Julia is damn near perfect.

1995: Sydney Segal, 41
Again back to no competition, literally.  But Sydney's a deserving winner, regardless of the competition.

1994: Victoria Baamonde, Edge of Extinction
Victoria's only competition was Baylor, and honestly guys, who would pick Baylor over Victoria?  Victoria's one of the hottest girls to ever play Survivor.  

1993: Gabby Pascuzzi, David vs. Goliath
Gabby beats out Jenna from Ghost Island and Julia from Edge of Extinction.  I've always liked Gabby, I think she has a great smile.

1992: Chanelle Howell, 42
This is best year of birth for hot Survivor women, and it's not even close.  Holy shit.  I have a bit of recency bias as I have developed a huge crush on Chanelle, but here's who just missed out: Figgy Figueroa, Ali Elliott, Wendy Diaz, Libby Vincek, Elizabeth Beisel, Morgan McLeod, Chelsea Townsend, Natalia Azoqa, Alexis Maxwell, Chelsea Walker, and Jenn Brown.  Holy shit, indeed.  If not for Chanelle, I'd give this to Morgan.  

1991: Julia Landauer, Caramoan
I know, I just have this thing for her.  I think she's really pretty, especially on her season.  She wasn't without competition, though, in the form of Angie Layton, Alecia Holden, Simone Nguyen, Natalie Tenerelli, Stephanie Gonzalez, and Lindsay Dolashewich.

1990: Michele Fitzgerald, Kaoh Rong and Winners at War
I honestly thought there'd be more competition this year, but Michele beats out Michaela Bradshaw, Molly Byman, Jefra Bland, and Purple Kelly (Shin).  

1989: Bi Nguyen, David vs. Goliath
My birth year!  Again, my preference, but it was not an easy decision.  I love Bi, especially when she glams up.  Anyway, she beats out Katie Hanson, Erika Casupanan, Hali Ford, Sophie Clarke, Angelina Keeley, Hope Driskill, Kat Edorsson, Desi Williams, Mikayla Wingle, Andrea Boehlke, and Ciera Eastin.  Safe to say this is next best after 1992.

1988: Michelle Schubert, Millennials vs. Gen X
Yes, Michelle is married, but whenever she was on screen I couldn't not stare at her, she's just so pretty.  Anyway, she beats out Anna Khait, Jaclyn Schultz, and Liz Markham.  

1987: Kara Kay, David vs. Goliath
This was the toughest call so far.  I went with Kara simply because I just think she has likely aged the best.  She beats out Allie Pohevitz, Ashley Trainer, Katie Collins, Morgan Ricke, Jessica Johnston, Shan Smith, Alina Wilson, and Alicia Rosa.  

1986: Kelley Wentworth, San Juan Del Sur, Second Chance, Edge of Extinction
Kelley wins my girlfriend's birth year, and there wasn't much competition.  She beats out Semhar Tedasse and Kelly Czarnecki.

1985: RC Saint-Amour
For this year, I'm going with RC because two of the runners-up are married with kids, those being Jaime Dugan and Stephenie Valencia.  RC also beats out Aubrey Bracco, Krista Klumpp, and Chelsea Meissner.

1984: Paloma Soto-Castillo
I know in 1985 I just said I didn't pick two of them because they're married with kids and I ended up doing that here, but Paloma has kept her figure and looks about the same as when her season aired, which is impressive as her season aired 14 years ago.  Anyway, she beats out Whitney Duncan, Amanda Kimmel, Monica Padilla, Sydney Wheeler, Elyse Umemoto, Kelly Bruno, and Michelle Chase.

1983: Sarah Dawson, Philippines
Sarah's another one of those (like Julia Landauer) that I like more than most.  She's just pretty.  She beats out Kelly Sharbaugh, Michelle Yi, Brianna Varela, Marisa Calihan, Alexis Jones, and Natalie White.

1982: Parvati Shallow, Cook Islands, Micronesia, Heroes vs. Villains, Winners at War
This was a tough one, but I had to go with the fan favorite in Parvati, just edging out (for me) Brenda Lowe.  Both have had kids, so it came down to personal preference.  Parvati also beats out Jacquie Berg and Ashlee Ashby.

1981: Liliana Gomez, Fiji
I have a thing for a few early boots that not many remember such as Ashlee Ashby (above) and Liliana Gomez here.  I have no idea what she looks like now, but I know Latina's age like fine wine.  She beats out Sherea Lloyd, Danielle DiLorenzo, Darrah Johnson, Misty Giles, and Jenna Morasca.

1980: Julie McGee, San Juan Del Sur
Not a ton of competition, but I went with Julie because she's got a nice body and we know she's not with that D-bag John Rocker anymore.  Although you do have to question her judgment.  She beats out Julie Berry and Neleh Dennis.  

1979: Corinne Kaplan, Gabon and Caramoan
I've just developed a huge crush on Corinne.  She isn't a mom, but she looks like the prototypical MILF.  I guess you could call her a cougar, then.  She beats out Abi-Maria Gomes, Stephenie LaGrossa (now Kendrick), Jessica DeBen, and Sugar Kiper.

1978: Peih-Gee Law, China and Second Chance
Peih-Gee has aged incredibly well, so I had to pick her.  She beats out Sally Schumann, Dolly Neely, Christa Hastie, and Heidi Strobel (now Hamels). 

1977: Cecilia Mansilla, Cook Islands
Cecilia is yet another that not too many people know about, but should.  She was such a babe on her season.  She beats out Sarah Jones and Candace Smith.

And that's it, there wasn't anyone from 1976.  Honorable mention to 1969 with Laura Morett, who is a GILF.  I might add to this list with subsequent casts of Survivor.  

Fed up with this country

I am beyond fed up with the United States of America.  Yet again we have a school shooting and yet again there is pushback to regulating guns.  What the heck is wrong with people in this country?  In a comment section, I proposed banning all guns except hunting rifles and handguns, and I was met with a reply that basically said I had no idea what the 2nd amendment was about.  They said it's so that in case the government becomes tyrannical we can fight back, essentially.  Um... what?  That has never been an issue in our country.  

I hate that politicians are more obsessed with power and control and winning than they are bettering our country.  Our two-party system is beyond broken, with both sides going further and further out, although I could argue the left has stayed closer while the right has become extremists.  I could also argue the left cares more about the country than winning (at least when compared to the right).  When a political party tries to stop the validation of an election by overthrowing the capital, you know you care more about winning than about the well-being of our country.  

The Republican party has gone too far, and if they are given control of this country, things will go south very fast.  Not that the Democratic party is entirely free of blame, however.  They aren't quite the Yin to the Republican party's yang.  Meaning, how bad for the state of our country the Republican party is, the Democratic party is not equally as good.  

I hate arguing politics online, yet I continue to do so.  To no avail, I might add.  It's pointless.  

So what can we do?  Hope for the best, I guess?  The best-case scenario is the Democratic party slowly returns our country to its former glory.  Fact of the matter is, even if given two terms, no president could right this ship that is our country.  Obama tried, and while he was able to do a lot of good things, our country was still left divided.  

Our divide has led me to consider possibly living elsewhere later in life.  Probably not, but Canada is sounding kind of nice about this time.  If our founding fathers could see our country now, they'd probably faint.  They'd roll over in their graves if they could.  

All we can do is vote in EVERY SINGLE ELECTION, and vote for the right people.  The people of this country need to vote based on what's best for this country, not name recognition or political party.  Also, people need to vote out anyone who has worn out their welcome in the senate, congress, or other office.  We need to impose term limits, or we need to vote out those who have been in power for too long.  

I hope and pray we can do the right thing as a country.  I hope and pray more and more children are brought up with better values.  I hope and pray my worst fears are never realized.

Furloughed Yet Again

 Ugh.  It's happened again.  And again, it's not my fault.  For the second time in two years, I have been placed on mandatory leave through no fault of my own.  The first time was because of the COVID-19 pandemic.  Our business couldn't sustain and they couldn't afford to pay me.  This time is also because the business can't afford to pay me.  We weren't generating the loans that we needed to.  And oddly enough, our business is down largely due to mortgage rates skyrocketing, which is a result of the COVID-19 pandemic.  This COVID pandemic has put me on furlough twice now and I'm sick of it.

If you recall the first time, I was on leave for about four months before fully quitting and finding another job.  It ended up being a blessing in disguise as it led me to a much better job; a job I enjoyed doing so much more and a job that I got paid more to do.  This time, at this point it's hard to see how this will be a blessing in disguise.  The best case scenario I can see is that I get back to work in 2-3 months and my boss is ultra appreciative of me sticking around.  I still would have lost out on 2-3 months of pay. 

It's a bit different this time--I'm still keeping in touch with my coworkers and I'm still "working".  We agreed upon a deal that I won't really delve into, but it's a deal that kind of benefits both of us. 

Again, I'm left with a bunch of time on my hands.  And this will be the third time in four years that I had a 2-5 month break, and they all happened around this time of the year.  After getting let go by Safeway in 2019, I went 4.5 months from mid-April to the start of September without work.  After getting placed on leave because of COVID in 2020, I went 5 months from mid-March to mid-August without work.  Now this time I'm placed on leave/furlough in May.  Boy, these spring months have not been kind to me.

I'm really hoping this time is not 4 months or more.  My boss told me 60-90 days (expected).  Like the other times, I have savings to fall back on, but if these three months pass and there's no sign of me coming back, I may have to make a difficult decision.  I don't want to have to look for another job.  I hate that process.  And I really like my job, and I highly doubt I could find another job that is comparable in terms of work and pay.  

With this time, I may try to find some work I could do from home (Just a side job).  I want to try to lose weight by going on long walks and working out.  If I can lose some weight and get back to work in 2-3 months, this break actually may end up being a blessing in disguise.  I've always thought that my biggest obstacle to losing weight has been that I don't have the time.  Well, now I do.  

Also, I thought I'd add that my employer is in the process of moving to another office.  We had been working out of my boss's garage, but my boss recently purchased a new home and is moving there, so we had to find a new office.  We did find one, but they wanted too long of a lease term.  So it sounds like my coworkers are going to be working at my boss's new home until they find a new office.  My boss's new home is in Auburn, which would be an absolute bitch of a commute for me as I live in Bothell.  

I hope to update here in a few months with a positive update!  I'm optimistic that I will be able to return.  My boss built a successful business model and I honestly can't imagine someone who could come out of this better, given this situation.  I asked him how confident he was that I could come back, and he said he was as confident as he could be.  We're fortunately at a time of year where business could pick up.  If we were heading into winter, I wouldn't be as optimistic. 

Worst case scenario, we end up parting ways.  I think I'd try to find a position in the same line of work.  But I really don't want that to happen, enough that I just don't want to discuss it here anymore.   I have savings to fall back on, and I'm willing to give my boss and our company even more than the 2-3 months he said, because the alternative is simply not an appealing option in the slightest.  What sucks is that I had plans to use that savings for a down payment on our home in 2023, so hopefully my savings doesn't take too big of a hit.  I'm going to remain optimistic and I'll update here in a few months.  Wish me luck!

People Depress Me

 I have often muttered to myself, "I hate people."  That's not really true.  I say it because it's short and sweet and an oversimplified version of what I really feel.  To elaborate, I merely hate the actions of people that I witness.  I despise people's choices and their inability to see how they are wrong or lacking intelligence or being rude.  But all of this leads me to believe a different, still simple saying: that people depress me.  It depresses me to know what society has and is coming to.  Here are the types of people that I would say fall under that category, and likely anyone that falls under one of these categories likely falls under multiple categories: 

- Rude and impatient drivers: I've already detailed this not once, but multiple times.  So I won't go into detail here.  But they just have no consideration for other people, largely like others on this list.

- Litterers: I just can't understand this.  Littering makes any area look so much worse.  I see garbage everywhere and wonder what would lead a person to just discard their trash on the ground and not in a proper receptacle.  I've dirtied my jackets and pants pockets with food wrappers instead of littering because I am that against littering.  No scratch that, I did that because I am a decent human being.  I go on jogs a couple times a week, and I often pick up trash while on my jogs.  I also will pick up trash if I'm walking to and from my apartment and I see it.  I wish others would do the same.  But more importantly, I just wish people wouldn't litter.  I know some litter is accidental, but it's largely purposeful and just pisses me off. 

- Retail "Karens": I've seen videos and heard stories of people screaming at retail/service workers over the stupidest things, and I wonder what on earth could lead them to do that?  If I ever received service that was as bad as humanly possible, I wouldn't even stoop that low.  I would leave a bad review and either contact them on their website or contact the store manager.  The "Karens" that do this have clearly never worked in the service industry or have forgotten what it was like to do so.

- Trump supporters: I don't want to get too political here, but Donald Trump was not a good president.  Any independent voter will tell you that.  He mocked someone with a disability, proposed nuking hurricanes and raking up forests, and tried to steal the 2020 election.  And you cannot argue any of those things.  He was caught on tape trying to persuade an election official to find or give him more votes.  So forgive me for losing faith in humanity when I hear of people defending this man and wanting him to become the leader of our country again.

- People who don't follow rules or laws and get away with it: Generally when I think of these kinds of people I think of drivers, such as red-light runners, speeders, people who don't signal when merging, etc,  which would fall under my first category.  But that also includes people who do not renew their vehicle registration tabs.  Why must I pay $100/year to renew my tabs but they don't have to?  But then there are also people who didn't wear masks when signage entering a private business says that they have to.  Also, on my way to work, I pass by a sign that says the road ahead is closed (due to slight flooding), but yet I see people drive down it all the time.  I curse these people.  I take the long way around because I, unlike so many people, abide by the rules.

I'm sure there are others, and if there are, I will add them to this list.  

Dealing with Anxiety at My Current Job

 I've talked about my battles with anxiety before, even with my past job.  It seems as though there are very few jobs, if any, that I'd be capable of doing and would not give me anxiety.  I wish I didn't fret and worry about things all the time, but as anyone who's dealt with anxiety before would understand, I can't help it.  

At my current job, I feel anxious more than I'd like.  I'm the one that puts together loan files, calculates income, basically makes sure people are qualified for a mortgage loan.  If there's ever a file that I'm a bit unsure about, I fret about it until the loan goes CTC (Clear To Close).  

Fortunately, I have ways to reassure myself with files.  I can and have reached out to our processor, who used to work with the lender we use most.  I have access to the entire Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac guidelines, and I have some other coworkers who are pretty knowledgeable, too.  But sometimes, there isn't an answer for a particular subject/question and I am left to worry.  

Whenever there's something we miss or mess up on, it's just ruins my day, especially if it has a chance of denying a loan.  There was one day that I messed up on a number for a tax lien, and I remember going home after work that day and crying.  It was the most I had cried in at least ten years.  I just could not keep my emotions in any longer.  Fortunately, I never got in trouble for that error.  There have been times that I have been borderline yelled at by my boss, which I arduously try to avoid.  

What I also hate is when my boss yells at my coworkers.  Even if it's not me, I feel their residual heat and I can't help but feel awful too, even if the issue is completely and 100% not my fault.  I wish I could be like someone who can deflect that anxiety because they realize it's not on them.  I am not one of those people.

There is hope, however.  I feel like the more I learn, and the more my work gives me experience and knowledge, the more assured I can be with loan files.  I feel like I can eventually get to a point where I am familiar with all kinds of situations, incomes, credit histories, you name it.  That is because I feel like I'm starting to feel that way.  

I am not perfect, but in my position, I'm basically expected to be.  To anyone who might consider a job in my profession, I say I hope you are detail oriented and I hope you don't suffer from anxiety.  Those would be my main two prerequisites for my position.  Unfortunately, I only fulfill one of those requirements.  

But I've got to learn to live with it.  I've got to grow and learn from my mistakes (which I have started to already), and I can't let my anxiety define me or affect my work.  And I hope 6 months or a year from now when I look back at this post, I can say I made some progress.  

Need a New Car

It was a year ago at this time that I was saying to myself, "I need a new job."  Well, it's now a year later and I am now saying, "I need a new car."  I really do.  I have had only one car my entire life.  Any other car I've driven has technically been someone else's.  My Honda Civic has been the only car I've ever owned, and I think it's time to move on.  

My Civic has given me a few problems recently.  When I took it to get its oil changed a few months ago, they told me it had an oil leak.  Before I could get the oil leak fixed, the check engine light came on.  Of course, the light went off before I was able to get the oil leak fixed.  But I was able to get the oil leak fixed.  However, the mechanics told there is a problem with the gear shaft that is a very expensive fix, way more than the value of my car.  I've still been driving my Civic and the check engine light comes on and goes off every few days.

I've had my Civic for 10 years.  It's done a lot for me.  Gotten me to three different jobs in my life.  It's driven me all over the state, from Spokane to Forks to Deception Pass to Leavenworth.  I've only put about 40,000 miles on it in my ten years of owning it.  But it's had its share of issues.  I've not only had problems with oil leaks, but also the steering, brakes, battery, and muffler.  I've probably put twice as much into repairs and maintenance into the car as I spent on it to purchase it.  

I've been fortunate enough to save up money to be able to afford a new car.  I'm just being extremely picky, because this is a huge decision.  This will also be a car I'll want to own, probably for close to a decade.  I know I want something larger like an SUV or a wagon, something I can fit furniture in.  I wish I had a nickel every time I wish my Civic was bigger to be able to transport something.  I also want it to have low miles and be fairly newer.  Yes, I'm shopping used, but preferably slightly used.  Maybe my third car will be a brand new one.  

I am just having the hardest time deciding.  It's like if you got to determine what your kid would be like.  How on earth do you decide?  You almost have to pick a few of your favorites and then pick one at random.  I've seen a couple that I feel like I'd be mostly happy with, but there's always something about the car that I'm not a huge fan of, whether it's the car's lack of horsepower, its low MPG, or its high amount of imperfections (scratches, dents, etc.).

I've been rating each car I find that fulfills at least most of my requirements.  I'm waiting to find one that scores high in each category: price, MPG, horsepower, make/model, and even color.  Like I said, there have been a few that have been close, but were just missing on something.  I'll hopefully find one soon that gives me warm fuzzies and one that people will look at and say, "Yeah, that suits him."   

More ranting about rude and impatient drivers

A while back, I did a post on impatient drivers called, "Impatient Drivers: You are the absolute WORST!"  I thought I'd follow up from that with a few instances of other drivers and what they have done.  

I wanted to say that I have seen more rude and impatient drivers in my 10+ months since starting my new job than in any other 10 month stretch of my life.  It must be the routes I take.  I drive from Bothell to Woodinville each workday and then back.  It's almost a daily occurrence that I see a driver do something rude to me or other drivers, illegal, or both.  

Here are a few of the worst instances:
- I've had two drivers (so far) pass me from a right turn only lane.  Basically, there are three lanes at an intersection.  One is left turn only, one is straight (only), and one is right turn only.  At one of these types of intersections, I had a guy in a giant pickup go straight from the right turn only lane and use it to pass me.  I was so pissed.  I could tell he was using it to pass me on purpose.  There was another instance at a different intersection where someone passed me, but I could tell they were clueless and just thought the right lane was a straight lane as well.  I still honked at them, because they need to pay attention.  Even if you notice it at the very last second, you still have to turn right, and find your way around.  

- I've had so many drivers use a particular lane to pass me.  There's this one intersection where (on my way home), there's a right turn lane, but it is not a right turn only lane.  You can go straight as well, but the lane ends shortly after the intersection.  I wish I had a nickel for every time someone has passed me on this road.  This past week going home, four of the five days some asshole used the right lane to pass me.  It's a rule of thumb while driving that you're not supposed to pass people on the right.  If you go straight from this type of lane, you are not supposed to pass people, you are supposed to yield, signal (it's amazing how many people don't signal), and get in where you can.  You do not speed by everyone you can.  If you do, you are an absolute ASSHOLE.  There's someone that lives in our apartment complex that has done this to me THREE times.  I know he lives in my complex because I followed him home (not intentionally).  He ended up saving maybe two seconds, which is ridiculous.  Anyone that does this: please go re-evaluate your life choices and the type of person you are.

- I once had a speed battle with a giant truck.  I was going along a highway where the speed limit is either 45 or 50.  I got approached fairly fast by a giant Toyota pickup.  I increased my speed, but then so did him.  I kept increasing my speed, but so did him.  He eventually got to a speed of close to 85, 90 miles an hour just to pass me.  Why did he feel this need to pass me?  I only feel the need to pass slow moving vehicles, which I clearly was not.  My only theory is that this man must have the smallest penis in the world, and feels the need to drive like this to overcompensate.  

- I have now seen multiple people blatantly go through a red light.  It's one thing to speed up to a light as it turns yellow, it goes red, and you still gun it through the intersection.  I've done that a few times.  I think we all have.  But it's another to be sitting at an intersection and just blatantly go through a red light and not wait for it to turn green.  I've seen two people do this, both at left turns.  Yes, it was clear, but how can people be so impatient that they cannot wait for a light to turn green?  It's these instances that I wish so hard that a cop saw them and get sweet justice when I see them get pulled over.  But of course, that's never the case.  

To sum up, I've blasted my horn more in the past 10 months than I'd care to admit.  I'm not just going to accept people taking advantage of my (usually) safe and steady driving.  I've seen a lot of law breaking from speeding to not signaling to rolling stops to running red lights.  I swear, the Bothell and Woodinville police departments could make a fortune if they just put more traffic cops out, especially during rush hour.  I know I need to not let it bother me so much.  Sometimes I listen to a video or music and it's enough to distract me from rude drivers, but not always.

I just wish people would drive more courteously.  We all are trying to get someplace and in a timely fashion.  The needs of these assholes that have been rude drivers are not superior to mine or anyone else's.  99.9% of the time these guys are just dicks, and it is not an emergency.  Please, if you are reading this, just drive courteously and don't pass people just because they're in your way.  Don't do anything illegal and put yourself and others in danger.  Just be nice to each other on the road.  Thank you.